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Lonely Memories
I find it interesting that the most unassuming things can suddenly trigger the most vivid memories of my betrayal. That has happened to me multiple times this year. The Loneliness Recently on my way home, I drove past the old location where my church used to meet. It was only a split second that I…
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Advice for Teens About Pornography
For a while now, I’ve been thinking about how I’m going to start the conversation about pornography with my own children someday. I don’t even have kids yet, but it never hurts to be prepared! But in the meantime, in the event that a teen came up to me and asked me about pornography, this…
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The Mistress
This is the first and longest poem I’ve written about porn and betrayal. I wrote it roughly around 2017-2018. The MistressYour addiction is a mistressThat has occupied a room in your brain.A room meant for passion, intimacy, covenantal loveOh, how I long to be there with you.So I knock on the doorSeeking the one my…
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Book Review: I Want to Trust You, but I Don’t by Lysa TerKeurst
I have heard of Lysa TerKeurst here and there throughout my recovery. But when I first read about her life, I knew I had to review at least one of her books. She has written many, many books, but I Want to Trust You, But I Don’t really caught my eye because of the title….
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The Boundaries I Set
Part of my recovery work included setting boundaries with my husband. At first, the idea of boundaries seemed so foreign to me. No matter how many times it was explained to me, I was still like, “What are boundaries, how do I set them, and what kind of boundaries do I set?” Eventually it clicked….
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The Aspen Tree
I submitted this poem in a poetry contest recently. Unfortunately, it didn’t win the contest, but I’m still proud of it nonetheless. I’ve always loved the way Aspen trees turn golden yellow and have eyes on their trunks that spy on you. And the way their leaves are shaped cause them to wave at you…
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My Problems with “Just Have More Sex”
If you’ve dealt with betrayal trauma caused by infidelity of any sort in your marriage, you may have felt like you have to keep having sex to keep your spouse faithful. Well-known pastors or even well-meaning people in your life may have even said so. Maybe you’ve even told yourself that. You might have heard…
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Book Review: Love and Respect by Emerson Eggerichs
Ok, I don’t think this one-book-review-a-month goal is going to work out. This one took weeks of reading, writing, processing, and taking notes. But I finally condensed them all into my personal take on Love & Respect! I have heard of Love & Respect a few times here and there growing up, but I didn’t…
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Bleeding Hearts
My Father, find your betrayed childrenAnd hear their silent suffering!They wander the earth with bleeding hearts.Their adulterers cast them aside like rubbishAnd they whore after what’s not theirs.The wives of their youthwalk aimlessly in lonely deserts,And rest in weary caves,Their hearts drip blood like breadcrumbs.Craftily the enemy follows the red trailTo find their hiding places.He…
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100 Things I Want to Say to Betrayed Spouses
As you might have already noticed, I enjoy challenging myself to find 100 things to say about a particular topic. But at time of this posting, this list is incomplete. I was originally planning to post this when I finally reach 100, but I’ve posted it early with the hope that at least someone out…