A Blog Written By a Betrayed Spouse, For Betrayed Spouses.

“Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” 2 Corinthians 1:3-4

Dear Betrayed Spouse,

See that picture up there? ^^^ I drew that myself some years ago, when I’ve felt like the Body of Christ as a whole isn’t really doing enough for spouses that are in the most unbearable pain known to man in the wake of their partner’s adultery. The crowd applauds the husband here for confessing his unfaithfulness and then everyone whisks him away in celebration, but leaving the wife behind, paying no attention to her.

Everyone except for one person. She saw that wife’s pain and stayed with her to embrace her and comfort her.

I drew myself as that one person, because I have experienced that unbearable pain before. I have for a very long time. Thankfully, the Lord has shown up to comfort me in such affliction, to heal me and my marriage and to help me move forward. Not only have I experienced such affliction, I have also experienced God’s comfort and love for me in the midst of such pain. And I want to share those experiences with you, so that you can experience that too.

And that’s why I started this blog.

I started this blog to chronicle my betrayal trauma journey, to share my experiences, what I’ve learned, and what I’m still learning about betrayal trauma and how I am healing.

I have declassified all the journals I’ve filled over the years, and I now post them here for betrayed spouses and partners. I transcribe the things I’ve written in my old journals, often in their raw, uncensored, unedited form, as I originally wrote them at the time. I also post more fresh content as I learn new things and ponder the things of life. I also post poetry and even book reviews and recommendations.

So if you’re a husband or a wife who has been betrayed, whether that’s a physical affair, you found out your spouse still uses pornography, if you’re divorced, separated, still married, or never married,

this blog is for you.

This is for any betrayed partner who needs encouragement, hope, and just the message that you are not alone! And that there is hope!

Not only do I want you to read my words and think, “I could have written that!” I also want to show the rest of the world that this is what betrayal in marriage feels like! This is what cheating and secret pornography use does to your partner! Whether that betrayal is resulting from extramarital affairs or from pornography use. Both are forms of betrayal and adultery, and they both cause the most unbearable, unspeakable pain. I’ve spent years finding the words for this kind of pain. Now I’m ready to share the words I have found to help betrayed spouses find their voice. 

I know how hard it is to put this kind of pain into words. So if you just can’t find the words to describe it, please use mine. Find your voice!

Sincerely,